i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.