He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
