Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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