I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
