Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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