This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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