# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize