and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize
