ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
