ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Randomize