I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
vagina is talking i cant
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize