I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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