Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
organizing the empties. That sober.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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