tell your sister to shave her snatch
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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