So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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