Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
