My Higher Power is John Stamos
Its about making memories worth repressing
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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