Soap is not a condiment
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
