Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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