i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
