theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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