girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
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