is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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