ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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