Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
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I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
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She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
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