why didn't you poke me back
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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