Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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