Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
You made out with two different species that night
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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