I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize