i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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