she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
