Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I woke up under a house in Key West
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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