Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
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