Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
