Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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