Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
3pm strippers are depressing
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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