She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize