on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
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