I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
