can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
