Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
