WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
