Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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