Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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