That's intense
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
sex in a hospital.. check
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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