Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
