hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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