fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
