That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
