Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i would punch a child for taco bell
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize