i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize