lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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